Monday, August 9, 2010

mana shortage: what have we done

"Treeeees!!" rickrolled the sadist and sexy she-jaguar.

Trees. Forests. Green alive areas. Compost butt plugging seasonal fucks. She-jag was not taking their presence as a present. She moreso found smackfaced reasons to sob hurtywurds at their slightly thirst-quenched skin. And she was not alone on her hate date. Most of BedRock were salivating over her caws. Trumpeting major and E-minor blASSts straight from the rough streets of Gullet and Sphincter borough, the Man-ephants and tele-a-sauruses were straight raping. Tying red (bone) rope from tree to pompousness, they tugged. Such tugging. One could newname their jobs as TUG Jobs.

These fuckers gave 900,000 of the meanest, classiest, and moderately cute tuggy's I've ever had the hispanic sauciness to witness.

And when the woods, forests, trees, leaves (of the wipey kind and the gambit-throwy kind), and deeeeep penetrating (wink?) roots finally devasculated their boner-holds to their loving and drunken mother earth, well, things got....wierd.

The mountains thought they could run a couple mucks, so they whisper to the swamps "ayyyyyy mans, sup with a little of this? and perhaps a touch of HUFFING GASOLINE AND ETHER?" They obviously had trouble keeping their mouthies muffled once they ingested a little of this, hense tall lined abrazor fonts.

What with the Mounts gettin thizzy and huffy, the flying diamonds and nerds of prey saw an opportunity to go high and get high. The nerds already had their scotch tape out and the diamentes turned spanish. However when they reached the point of crashing the drugparty, the enormous sedimentary coneheads got way brick. Spittling things like "get the futts out, gutt sucking pewterbottom cauldron!!!!!" and "suckle twixt my downlips and recieve my velvety vengence!!!!"

Meanwhile, in the land of everybody-and-mana else, Squints left the sanlauh't and took form as kay (jewelers) os! The Kaos was comprable to FOURloko with deadskin on the mouth. The merfolk, rubbed up by all the lava that the mountains were drunkenly excrimating, started violenty hearing ghosts.. The ghosts had left the swamps and old peoples bedsides to be heard (which is how they get their plasma off).. A flock of Giant quails squirted into being and started grazing where once was drunken earth's party manimals, and no one could fucking hunt them.. Gaspar LaMarc grew pubic staches instead of his usual crop of race Korn. Merchants turned into urchines and vice versa, so humans lined the streets looking like zombies and fluttering their arms to collect mouth mites while the reefs were filled with sin, drugs, religion, dumb opinions, and boring TV shows!

She-jag was delighted. She reveled in her maestropeice. Claps and applause bombarded her supercocky and obviously dust addled brain. Many a thanks were given by the 76ers, lebong james, and the ghost of nanny mcphee. . . . . . . "EUUUELrLRLPHFF" and up came allllllll the poppies, boomys, acid pops, and nitrous breathies.

And laura sat on her couch in the living room, panting, covered in evidence. Then Jaleel-oshit-imean- Erkel came in and said "FINALLY, ITS FUCK TIME BITCH!!!!!"




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